Invasion of the Mary Sue
by Silentflier
Summary: When a girl recruits the flock for a mission Max has to step in to save her Flock. Warning Mary Sue killing will ensue. For the contest Kill Mary Sue! R


**Hey people. I thought this might be fun to write, so sit back and get ready to watch some Sues crash and burn! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Maximum Ride. **

Max P.O.V.

We walked into McDonalds, wings tightly tucked against our backs and our windbreakers covering any bumps. We walked over to the line and figured out what we wanted to order. Once we made it to the counter we all had our orders figured out. The cashier looked at us, bored.

"Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?" She droned in monotone. As we told her what we wanted her eyes got progressively bigger until they were as big as dinner plates.

"Um ok but that might take awhile." She said still looking a little unnerved.

"Well that's just craptastic! I'm hungry!" Iggy whined. I rolled my eyes.

"Iggy, language!" I scolded him. He sulked. "That's fine, we'll wait." I assured the cashier. With that we went over to a booth and sat down.

"You know, I've never liked this color." Nudge said, motioning to the booths. "I've always thought that maybe they would look prettier as a lilac or periwinkle. Also- Mphhh!" I laughed. Iggy never misses. Soon they called our order. We grabbed it and began to eat. About half way through my chocolate milkshake everyone let out a simultaneous, "Gasp!"

I looked up and standing before us was the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. She had long, jet-black hair and sparkling, emerald eyes.

"Hello." She said and the whole flock nearly melted. She had the most amazing voice. It was like a thousand heavenly choirs singing praises. What am I saying? I think Nudge has been making me watch too many romance movies.

"Uh…" Iggy said, ever so intelligently. "You're so beautiful." He said, practically drooling.

"How can you tell?" I snapped. This girl was making me irritable. He turned to me.

"I can see, Max." He stated. He looked over- joyed.

"Yes. I healed his eyes and now his sight is better than ever." The girl trilled. I looked at Fang. He was practically a puddle! Men!

"What's your name? I bet it's something awesomilistic, like Glory or Marrillia! I would love to have a name like that, but-." She was cut off.

"Hush child. My name is Mariann Suzanna Leia Lavender Lania Samantha Anabella Starshine Diamond Aurora. But you may call me Mariann." She said in her perfect voice. Impressive, she made Nudge stop talking. Nudge stops talking once in a blue moon. Maybe.

"What do you want?" I asked her, suspicious.

"I come to you with a mission. We must go to Candy Mountain, the Wonderful World of Wonder and Might." I looked at her skeptically.

"Yeah, sure. Then we need to go kidnap Scooby Doo and steal the Mystery Machine." I said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes. Could this chick get any crazier?

"But Max we have to help Mariann, she needs us." Angel said pleadingly. Oh dang it! Bambi eyes.

"Please Max." Gazzy said, giving me the same look.

"Yeah Max we need to help her. We can't leave a beautiful, amazing, helpless young girl like this." Fang said. My mouth dropped open in shock. I think that's the longest sentence Fang has ever said.

"Maybe you should just make me leader. After all I am 5% bird, 2% cheetah, 4% phoenix and 89% human." Mariann said perfectly. Dang perfectness.

"Oh wow, really?" Iggy queried wide-eyed. "That's so psychedelic!" He exclaimed. I looked at Iggy.

"I don't think that word means what you think it does." I told him. He shrugged.

"I've never been big on learning or words." He replied, looking uninterested. I walked away to think while the Flock drooled over Mariann. Suddenly someone jumped in front of me. He was wearing a black T-shirt and black pants. He was carrying a backpack.

He yelled, "I am Fred the Mary-Sue killer! I am here to help you in your perilous quest to save the universe!" I looked at him strangely. Seriously was everybody on crazy pills today?

"How?" I asked. It's best to humor the crazy people.

"The only way to kill them and make sure they don't come back as an undead zombie is to throw them in the Abyss of Certain Destruction." He spoke as if he knew what he was doing.

"Why can't we just send them to Jupiter or something? At least I know where that is." I replied, puzzled.

"Because they are so perfect only true DESTRUCTION can finish them." He said dramatically.

"Um… Ok but how do we get to this Abyss?" I asked.

"I will teleport you there. But you will have to engage the Mary-Sue in deadly combat so you can throw her into the pit." He said, dramatically once again.

"Ok then teleport us there." I said stretching out, ready for the fight of a lifetime. He pulled out a little device and began fiddling with it.

"Ok any day now." I said, tapping my foot impatiently.

"Hang on this takes awhile! It's a very delicate instrument!" He snapped. He looked frustrated.

Suddenly there was a BOOM! And a flash of green light and I was standing at the edge of a chasm. So was Mariann, unfortunately and so was the rest of the flock. The Flock looked disoriented, luckily so did Mariann. I ran over to her and began pushing her towards the Abyss. Then she regained her balance and began fighting back. She aimed a kick at my head and at the same time punched my gut. I doubled over.

But suddenly I heard a crackling and I dove to the side. A bolt of lightning struck where I had just been standing. I tackled Mariann and felt several blows being delivered to my back. It was the Flock they were punching and kicking me! I ignored them and focused on Mariann. Suddenly I felt myself being lifted into the air. Mariann had her arms extended towards me. Telekinesis too? Dang. I twisted and broke free. I rushed towards her and delivered a series of blows to her head and stomach.

"Ahh! Fang! Help me!" She cried. He rushed to her side. "I don't think I can bear the pain." She whimpered. Dramatic much? Taking advantage of this situation, I grabbed her. She was light as a feather (a little flock humor). I threw her into the Abyss. It wasn't that deep so we could see her at the bottom.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" She shrieked, her voice was not so musical now. She began twitching until she vaporized mysteriously. Suddenly the Flock shook their heads and acted like they were waking up from a long sleep.

"Max, what are we doing here?" Nudge asked. She was looking around curiously. I explained about Mariann and they looked appalled.

"I really said that?" Fang asked quietly. I nodded. He hugged me and then kissed me softly.

"Now what?" Gazzy asked.

"Let's go home guys" I said and spreading my wings I took off and made my way towards home.

**Ok so love it, hate it? Either way R&R please.**

**~Silentflier**


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